Anne-Marie Evans

I just realized I've been away for several months. I'm producing a short film here in Denver, so I've been a bit distracted but in the most wonderful way. But, today I felt the urge to hop on here and say something. I vicariously live through a character in a series I'm writing right now. Her name is Jade and she's me. She's who I used to be and who I want to be. The only difference, she's won an Academy Award and I have not. So, you can only imagine how much I admire Jade. ;) Any who. A lot of thoughts and chatter stir my mental soup these days, especially as a screenwriter. Everything I hear, everything I say... it can all be used differently. I can use it as great dialogue.  Fearlessly . The conversations I have with myself and with other people are what inspire me the most and this is the beauty of character writing. It's truly a wonderful exercise for releasing -  to vent through someone else, someone you invented, someone you didn't invent ra...

Change is real but it doesn't have to mean you change who you are. It means you change.. the way you are . And the way you are is the way you've become . What's the difference? There's a big difference. Who you are is who you were born to be. It's your animus - your dispositions and intentions. It's your spirit-self. The one that says:  hey, be an artist! Or hey, go save lives in the Middle East!   Or hey go do some scary shit that will make your journey so breath taking you won't know where you began. And all that changes with time because change is real and being a glorified soul whether you paint or save lives can be a real struggle, and a lot of people don't survive the fray of being duty bound in constant creation mode. Because to be a prodigy is to be a survivor of your own fear and doubts and those inflicted. Ergo, we adjust our perspectives thus changing our dispositions and intentions - our views. I don't want to save the world, we...

I called you a monster this morning and I meant it. So go home monster because you're in my head. You're in my words. You're in my prayers. My pillow turns to stone when you don't leave me alone. Today I felt like something divine joined me in my office as I gave myself some down time to reflect. I was looking at the walls pretending the walls were listening. Maybe they do, listen. If only the walls could talk. The decorative fixtures made my eyes move waywardly. The knick knacks, the green and yellow galore. It makes me smile. Then... a transcendent moment of observing with my eyes closed took presence as though it was standing between me and those decorative walls. It felt like an angel blew her breath across my arms. Goosebumps, but for just a brief moment. Then my head spins and the spinning is loud like a rusty old marry-go-round on a grassy dune, but the grass needs watering. She spins with the wind, not with a child because she's old and won't be both...

If you could go back in time, however long ago - maybe you want to be three again and debt free, mom and dad still together, or maybe you want to be twenty four again so you can dodge that awful romance, the one that stole your faith in love, would you? Would you change everything if you could? Maybe just one thing. Maybe you wished you could go back fifteen years ago just so you could stop yourself from making that decision that flipped your life upside down - turned you inside out with your heart bleeding all over your shirt. Or maybe it was a decision that birthed the boredom that is... your life. Life can be quite boring - adventure less, mundane. And we only have ourselves to blame. That doesn't make you a victim though. It just makes you aware. Your life is your creation. That doesn't void God. I believe God is extremely real, but you are the reason for your cans and cants, your yes's and no's. God is the outcome. You can react however you chose to the God-outco...

Bring happy back. Don't worry about sexy because  happy is sexy.  And though it may feel fleeting at times, and ephemeral, and/or displaced or even gone, happiness is always here and it's always yours to keep, or better yet...  manage . If you can't manage your happiness, what can you do? Nobody can take it away from you. So, even if you think it's gone, it's not. Happiness doesn't get stolen from us because you can always BRING IT BACK. It doesn't just "run along" and it doesn't just "let go" or back out the way we do when we're... not happy. Happiness doesn't put in a 30 day notice because happiness doesn't leave! It doesn't move out. It moves within. Ergo, it's not a  feeling  because feelings are unreliable and they come and go. There's no tricks up it's sleeve. There aren't even twelve steps. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Happiness is a mind set. So, what's your min...

“Fear doesn't shut you down; it wakes you up”  ~Veronica Roth,  Divergent It wakes me up everyday. And it's not something that comes natural to us. I thought it was. You probably thought it was, or still do think it does, but it doesn't. Fear is not natural. It may be super easy to not trust someone, or, anyone in that matter (if we're real jacked up) because we're afraid they'll hurt us or betray us or dick us over in some fashion. It may even be the plight for most in the world cause it is in fact scary out there. A lot of people have lost their minds. It's easy to be scared but it's also just as easy to store some faith in humanity too, and in ourselves. We just have to remember what it is we unlearn everyday. We have to make a u-turn. We have to go back to love... and that's the hard part. The easy part is NOT turning around and going back. It's not being brave and taking those big risks that could change our life for the b...

We often have to find love in our own little world to find any love at all. And that love is sacred. The world is in so much pain. Terror of all sorts is sweeping the Earth with it's broom from hell and I'm left to ask myself: is this hell ? I don't know what I believe when it comes to the after life. If I die and go to Heaven then that would explain a lot, because this to me, feels a lot like the underworld. Call me crazy but I think it could be possible, and maybe if we were having this conversation in person, you'd look at me the way you'd look at someone who is very strange, or possibly invading your space because they're standing too close to you at the check out counter in the grocery store. I've seen it with my own two eyes. I've seen people stand too close to me and I've seen them crinkle their forehead at the thought that this might in fact, be  hell.  "No way Jose. I don't agree." - someone listening to me talk, or rea...