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Showing posts from 2011

right here where you are.

 "You have the power to bless your own life. Nobody can do it for you." -My Kundalini yoga teacher. Mantra: Today offers us some sort of opportunity, and life is beautiful. My mantra for survival. 6 days ago... Only minutes ago mid grind, an assisting voice with no name, physical attributes, or visible location, spoke to me, kind of like a wizard. I felt like Dorothy. I felt inspired by this vibration so seasonably articulated. I felt crazy. But hey, I'm never gonna survive unless I get a little crazy right? So, I get a little crazy. I can hardly help it. I want to know what "not crazy" means anyways. I have yet to discover it's opaque definition, and no one whom I've crossed paths with has yet to define it's meaning for me. And it's funny to me, because this is the typically and more commonly assumed, preempt, most fitting character trait: to be not crazy. It's coveted. It's preferred. It's poli

come alive.

"Live each present moment completely and the future will take care of itself."   -From a wonderful book entitled, Inner Peace...How to be Calmly Active and Actively Calm , by Paramahansa Yogananda .          Come Alive! To me, we must first understand fear .  This is a piece I wrote in my debut November Newsletter, "Heart & Soul". The portion became more intricate and expansive than I was expecting, my fingers and thoughts were on a roll. After writing it, I thought it was perfect for November's blog. So, here's what I had to say in my newsletter. Regarding Fear ... Lets embrace our fear today and make it our best friend! Let's do this by living fully in the present moment, starting right this second.       One deep breath in. Let it out. Let it go. Om.  When we transform our fear into our dearest confidant, we defy it. By trusting the tremendous "pressure"  we feel when faced with the onus of the day,

tick tock.

“Truths are many, but truth is one.” -Lama Surya Das On that note, what is truth? I think I ask this question in every blog I write. It’s become a pervading inquisition for me, a Q&A with an ambiguous epitome. I closed my eyes today, I calmed my breath and I attuned my self with my higher-self, and in just one single moment, time stood still. Dead in it’s ponderous and unrivaled tracks, I listened to silence...but only for a moment. Beautiful was her vibration. A prodigy I became. Though, how does one ever learn to incessantly lull such an opposing, hurried pendulum? How do we stop the galloping clock from ticking our lives to death? A beyond-demise phenomenon we already are, but when do we comprehend this information? When will we know everything we need to know? Must we merely gather our things and go rest in a quite room somewhere? Would a serene alcove endowed with energetic sympathy and solace, retribution and ethereal intensity do the job? Probably. But then there’s lif

sire of the jewel.

Sire of The Jewel. I needed this. I needed this struggle. I needed to see more clearly. Without this struggle...I'd be the same Lost without wisdom and unprepared for more pain. -AM "The key to realizing a dream is to focus not on your success, but on your significance." Dreams are seeds harvesting in fields of gold. Pictorial to our thoughtfulness, yet elusive to our mind, a prophecy promise thrives and flourishes bursting upward and onward like a castle in the sky, like the spirit after we die. And, as our paralleled lives turn all the tables around, we undeniably, though timidly detect our cryptic holiness amid every collision with life . We need the struggle to see more clearly, to see what we didn't see before. We have to withstand the devious and problematic interventions while at the brittle brink of death's illusions, because in an honest instant a sacred passion will spawn like a ray of light. We'll begin to inwardly

twist of fate.

If we didn't have problems, we wouldn't need God. So, we need problems. The Catch-22's in this so-called circle of life, you gotta love 'em. Or, hate 'em. It's one or the other. We're hypnotized by circumstance. Fate's invasion ambushes us when we least expect it leaving us fragmented and despondent--overwhelmed and overthrown by the emperor's of affliction. A friend of mine comforted me the other day with her affirmative voice of influence, an influence allocated beyond reason. She said to me; "You gotta go through hell if you're ever gonna to get to heaven." I commemorated her for her consoling foresight she so guilelessly worded. I felt inspired. Wisdom has no pretense. Wisdom is simply put. Wisdom is compassion. We go through hell because we don't have enough compassion for each other. Wisdom is one-ness with all life, because underneath all of our vindications, reasons, judgments and heartaches, there's a soul. There&

a sad kind of free. Pisces...a strange month.

Poetry By AM. A sad kind of free. I was thinking to myself this morning...freedom is kind of an unyielding burden in away. To be free from "it all" can feel so good, yet it leaves you so lonely so often--lonely and tired. Tired of the fight. Tired of the world. I guess it's a sad kind of free . You lose everything and everyone you ever loved more than you could ever have imagined, then you let it go and it sets you free. It's really sad actually. Love does hurt. I don't care what they say. To love and then to set it free....that hurts more than anything in the world. It's a sad kind of free No more you and me No more reasons to be Strong for you It's time to be strong for me And it's a sad kind of free To fly away like a bird And to know I'll always love you And to love you will always hurt. AM   Another poem I wrote... Dance on emptiness 'Cause a solid ground is over rated Laugh when you'd rather cry Cry when you kn

we have each other to thank.

There's got to be more to my life than this...right?  What the f***'s going on? God...? We've all bantered and hypothesized these ambrosial and concerning thoughts, maybe even on a daily basis too. Whether we're lying unsettled in our beds gazing at our truthful highest point, that unearthly point we reach when our pensive and despondent soul kicks our own ass, or delightfully curbing our senses in the oblivion of the night, our reassurance does depress and dismantle itself consistently, and we have each other to thank for that. Sabotage is something we primal and emotional dysfunctionalists, also known as "people", master at a very early age. I think I was three when someone really pissed me off for the first time. I cried and ran to my mommy, or I ran away from my mommy. It's one or the other. I was angry and powerless, much like many of us here on this hoity-toity, misery-inflated, huge balloon thingy we call "Earth". Although, the angry bu the garden of eden.

 May the long time sun shine upon you And may all love surround you And the pure light within you, Guide you on your way on. -kundalini prayer I believe "home" is nowhere to be found until you have found yourself. This is my Garden Of Eden. This is my home...      Among the relic and ensconced roots that tangle below our melodramatic thorns of emotions and trauma, lie the seeds we've unconsciously planted since our unexplained birth. The years have passed now and the seeds have bloomed. We've entered our very own Garden of Eden, a greenhouse of life on the verge of death, defunct and parched, starving for sympathy's waters. We've planted fruitless vines, and we've eaten the one-and-only apple over and over again. We've tasted the luscious fruit and we've savored it's promised pain. We've voyaged across the murky swamps of circumstance and drifted into the ocean of thought flooding our minds and stifling our faith, a much required fait